はじめて、はじめて、…〓

はじめてです

〓このブログにようこそ! 〓

昨日夜はですねパンダ姫や大河さんや俺も北の家族とBig Echoに居た.

写真や動画もある 〓

スッゴイ楽しかった - 「パンダ姫の歌はきれい」と思いました.

俺はもちろん「Islands In The Stream」が歌った
(^ー^)

今は新宿に行けいるChristmas Shoppingの為に
( ゜Д゜メ)

キャスパくんは手伝う 〓

頑張る!!

This is the strangest feeling.

I've already cried once tonight... now my mind is wandering a lot.

My favourite uncle – the member of my family I'm most like, and would most like to be like – is dying. As in, dying right now.

I'm 6000 miles away and powerless to stop it. My cousin only found out her dad was dying lastnight. This is shit. Really really shit.

Maybe not so bad for him, though. Which is the most important thing. We all have time for things to get better in our lives. He has not much time left. But he got to tell his family he was really lucky to have them. I'm just really upset that if this really is happening – and there's a complete un-reality to this happening so far away – then, I'm not going to get to hear him aever again. He's always got stuff to say... funny, interesting. It was a shock to see him a bit out of it last year. He was in hospital when the last stages of Wimbledon were on. I was back for J's wedding, and really wanted to see Uncle D.

But the rest of the time, he's got this mind... I can completely tune into and could just listen for hours. Days.

But he's going through the process of dying right now. Really actually right now. And all I can think of is that I hope he's not alone. Mum's going to be with him in about a couple of hours. I want to be there too. But there's over 24 hours, in between, and I've no idea how I would help. I just want to be there.

This is really really shit.

And I won't try to say whether it's better for him this way or not. He's got M.S., and has had the symptoms for a few years. But he doesn't whinge about it. Lately – in the last year – it got worse. But it wasn't at the final stages. This has just come out of nowhere. I just hope it's not too rough on him. It's going to be horribly rough on his wife and daughter, though... They're such a tight family.

I can't type any more about this.

I just wanted to acknowledge someone who's a great inspiration to me, and he's alive right now.

I'm happy about that.

Arse Biscuits

It seems that someone has cloned my card details somewhere in Japan. I know this, because I haven't left Japan for sometimes.

I discovered something amiss when I tried to withdraw some money for food (pretzels, turkey jerky and the like) this morning en route to work

And it's possible that Mr B is suffering from the same ill, as his card was recently inaccessible.

Feck. Is this the curse of the Yakuza in Matchington?!

Have to wait now for a new card to be delivered to HomeHome, then probably another week for it to get to here. Rubbish indeed.

At least I have some cash on me, thanks to the nice girl at the Benk allowing one withdrawal.

Just have to not blow it all at once! :o/

Ambivalent Anniversary

So, today's date was giving me reason to scratch my head a bit as it approached, and lastnight I finally realised what it was.

9th September is when I broke up with the Cat.

To be precise, it was the day after I hadn't been able to sleep because of his suicidal-sounding messages, and the day on which I went back to his flat to check that he hadn't, in fact, done anything more stupid than just sound suicidal.

Horrible weekend.

But, happier is of course what came soon afterward. And also, Saturday marks the 2nd anniversary of arriving in Japan.

Satoshi told me that the second year somewhere feels different. At the end of that second year, I can definitely add my testimony to that theory.

Wonder what the third year will feel like, short as it may be...?!

Anyway, just had brekkie in the NY caff. No more bagel set (boo hoo) but they have introduced a rather filling croque monsieur plate (sans drink, but water would do nicely).

Best be off soon, then. The Sun is in my eyes!

Also, I'm reading George Orwell's diary online. Taken from each corresponding date in 1938, it's starting to get interesting...!

A lot of Saturdays off...

... recently, but tomorrow isn't one of them :o(

So let's go over recent events.

Mr C has been dating his new guy (40-yr-old Japanese) since .. oooh... about 25th of August. haha And "T" will visit here on Sunday.

Last Sunday was a beach day out near Misaki-guchi, at a party thing that Mr C was pushing to go to and was really good fun. Even managed to get red but not peel

Casper is also working late tonight because of start-of-month stuff associated with the new job, and I'll join him for either a look at another flat tomorrow, or a second look at the one we couldn't see last week (he'll see it when I'm working). This is all assuming that nothing goes awry at work.

Oh, and Mr Kawasaki got in touch a couple of days ago to say hi, just as I thought he'd lost interest. So that was nice! ^_^

Oh, I should explain that I made a tit of myself after an evening out with Mr kawasaki. And felt extremely sheepish the next day. But he was very polite. Which never reassures me, of course. But we've kept in touch.

Visited my Narita mate the other evening, which was cool.

um..... tried to get work done and mostly succeeded on Mon and Tues. An annoyance from East Coast USA sort of derailed that, but now I'm back on duty, so can't really get stuck in. Just do the odd bit of debugging in my spur time.

Phoned the folks for a bit lastnight, but not too long.

Ageha was fun, but Disney guy (who I'm on pretty genial terms with) got a bit drunk and meant I spent much of the end of the night looking for him when I was absolutely wrecked. Boo. But he was okay and we had a nice chat on the shared DenEnToShi line ride home.

I'm now wondering if I posted that Disney Guy and I split up. Well, we did. At the end of June (those of you who know who I'm talking about will recognise his name in there).

So I've been single for two months, with the occasional date.

But since Mr C is my closest friend and is a) moving to Big Town, and b) dating someone (plus the usual c) end/start of month stuff meaning he's out of social commission), and ... well I can't say, but other reliables aren't in great spirits... life feels very very adrift these days. I feel like it's all unravelling already.

Just after it was all more or less together. If I want to go out and get smashed, I get heartfelt abuse for not sticking with The Plan. Or it turns depressing. If I go home, I'm reminded of how alone I am. If I stay out, like I am tonight in the caff, it doesn't feel quite so bad. But recently I can't stand being alone.

So I stay in touch with a million people by phone mail until it drives me crazy, and then I just don't reply to anyone for a night. Lastnight I went on MSN from the NY caff across town, en route back from a solo swim, and wasted all my relaxation time calming down Ikea guy. More on whom another time. But... Purely Selfish Alert...

I have to get this off my chest. None of the people I know here is asking how I am.

It's driving me crazy, too. Just f*cking listen for a minute. I know I can be a good listener most of the time. But I need it too!!

Part of the reason it didn't work out with Disney Guy was the lack of being able to get my point across. W wasn't good at talking full stop.

But at least Mr C will listen a bit – so I think that's part of the reason I'm already missing him.

ooofff.... I'm not an uplifting person to be around these days.

After 11 years of adult single-dom, I'm now single for the longest time since the crazy work time that covered the gap between Tony and W.

I feel trapped that I can't make any plans, too. Not here, anyway. And this place is where i live, so what should I do? It's my home from home.

C said I should just enjoy the time I have left here, but my major connections are failing... he didn't say he wouldn't be around much, too. I feel like I've been duped. That's horribly childish, and I know he didn't mean it. So – quite apart from the fact that I can't be angry at him – I'm not anyway. I just shouldn't have counted on second-best either.

Bleurgh... I'll probably remove this post. It's not good for anything except self-indulgent catharsis.

Work tomorrow will make me free! hah

going home in a bit to watch something good (I hope) like Elizabeth. Or Moulin Rouge.

Lingerie

"Lingerie is Love Jewelry", declares an ad on the train, by the prerumably not-wholly-unbiased Peach John...

Today's Applause du Jour....

... goes to long-time favourite Max Barry (author of the brilliant Jennifer Government).

In talking about voting, he manages to come up with a gem of a quote

People who try to guess what other people want end up settling on the
dullest, most conservative, and uninspiring choice available, even if none of
them personally prefer it.*

Well done, Maxy!

Dark and dirty game arcade

Lastnight, out of a mixture of curiosity, tiredness and self-suggestibility (I'd mentioned the place to Dave in connection with old video games during the day), I investigated the local game arcade, close to the place I got my first barber cut in Matchington.

It wasn't as shiny as Round One, where I'd been with the Scots on Friday night (albeit pished), and there were huge fans set up at the end of some of the aisles to try and bring down the huge temperature created by all these screens and hidden computers.

I was delighted to see that there really were some old games there (Street Fighter 2 Hyper edition was one of them, and that's got to be at least a decade old, along with some version of Darius), in amongst a bunch of strategy games, a few gambling machines, and a few normal style arcade games.

Strange what catches your attention, though.... most of the machines were at seat level. Helped by the fact that they had seats for the entranced customers. And over at the far end of one of the far aisles was something I'd never seen away from the beach or a club: a shirtless Japanese guy! He was about my age, slim and mildly tanned, wearing suit trousers and shoes, one shin perched on the other thigh, dragging on a fag like it was keeping him alive, with a fag packet and a half-drunk plastic beaker on the console of the machine, completely into the game. I did a double-take because you never see people undressed here, even in the summer (it's considered rough).

I wandered round a bit more, considered playing Darius, then just got out; it was noisy, and warm, and I was tired from the gym and not much sleep the previous night, and just wanted to rest.


Sometimes it's rewarding to follow your instincts, though. I like that side of Japanese life because of what it's in contrast to: it's a little bit seedy and it's always nice to know that there's colour in life...

It's so humid here,

20080718 2104

... it looks foggy!

Can't do much tonight anyway, cos I'm fecked after this week, emotionally and physically.

But have to be strong, eh?

Work tmrw, and on the holiday Monday, too. Very much inclined to go to TGIs for a beer tonight. Just don't want to be the centre of attention. At ALL

House is a kip, but I can tidy it tmrw night or Sunday morning while I'm waiting for the Toot parcel to arrive!

Wish the Scottish Couple was available for a light drink in the NM bar tonight. Mr C is out on enforced drinking with the new work crowd.

Must be edging towards 30 C tonight...

I misr Mr C a lot, but I think I'm over-sensitive to his absence at the moment cos I'm suddenly single.

He had months of me being around only part of the time when I dated Jun. And towards the end with Jun, he told me he realised he was lonely :o(

I told him how I really felt shortly after that point. Then left for England.

I guess in the 7 weeks between that and me splitting with Jun, he lived up to his bhallenge and tried to be better.

Without me. And knowing him, he probably decided that if I was doing a dangerous thing having fallen in love, he would try to not make gt any more dangerous by getting closer.

Dunno.

All just speculation, eh? But noone to speculate with, so it's just me on my own at 9pm. Arriving home.

Evening... from the office

Well, here I am, and of my own choice.

Mr C is out drinking tonight, but sent an interesting message about being touched up on the oul' 電車 this morning on only his second day. He liked it though, deviant...

Anyway, I'm choosing the low-guilt opportunity to shirk the gym because I want to get some online information finally put up before the big leview next week (I think).

I won't lie and say I'm happy these days. Everything is in a state of flux. Absolutely everything. And it would maybe lift my mood if I could get out onto my balcony to chill a little these days, but it's closed off.

I don't want to go out and get smashed to have some craic because a) I did that on Thursday and Friday and so that's been done, and b) after some of the photos on Sunday, I want to get into shape seriously.

Also, I'm sunburnt, so I don't want to anything that puts pressure on legs, back or shoulders ;oD

Anyway, I knew things would change when Casper moved office. The trick is to enjoy it and get into it!

So, to break the mood, here I am with red t-shirt AND red face ;oD

This weekend, I have been mostly...

...at the beach! Hurrah!

Or travelling to'n'from them :o)

Brilliant adventure today to a far-off beach in Chiba. Mr C knew about it, but 1st time for both eejits.

Got to this place about 1030 after leaving Matchington 4 full hours earlier.

But it was worth it.

After yesterday's late, somewhat cloud-covered arrival @ Enoshima, we had a really nice wander around the island, after leaving the two Scots supping beer on the beach.

Mr C and I had taken a wander down the beach away from the stalls and music. From there, we heard what sounded like festival drums, so that was intrigue enough. So we made our way across the bridge to the island, got ice cream (purple sweet potato, and pineapple) and wended Mur way up through the shops, eschewing the damed escalator to take the steps further up the hill to a 7 gods shrine. Whichever one has to do with money and good fortune, judgi
ng from the rituals.

But today was something else ＾▽＾

Started doing THIS now... (°_°)

Me Hear, Me Like

Won't be large posts, just stuff I hear on radio /ON LINE / wherever... that I like. Video posts an added bonus via YeTube.

One week and one good weekend on..

... and the mood is substantially improved.

Hats off to Casper for most of that.

Friday night, did onsen (not my idea), which had both the normal hot baths, and a merciful cool bath to help combat the summer night heat.

Saturday brought an unusual series of events:

1. went to gym, not having slept enough and therefore was unusually weak (also, not going for 10 days before that probably didn't help ;oD )
2. Casper got word that his lords & lez's beer-garden event (which I was going to avoid) was going to be an afternoon thing and thought about backing out
3. he then asked if I wanted to join in
4. I thought carefully – lack of genkiness (a word?) was making me think I'd be shite company in a mostly Japanese-speaking environment
5. came around to the idea when it looked like we'd just pop in for a little while and then go shopping (original afternoon plan)
6. on agreeing, it transpired that the beer garden was up a mountain. Resistance quickly subsided.
   
7. we went for it, stopping off to get some cold noodles (in my case) and rice bowl (his) and then took the funicularse up the mountain.
8. met Kazu (Casper's mate) and his crowd
9. no lez's turned up :o(
10. we went in anyway and got drunk for 2 hours and the craic was very good
11. I actually saw someone throw away alcohol and didn't mind: it was 飲み放題 (all you can dhrink) after all!!
12. came back and sobered up with some shopping in the summer sales
13. went to bed and slept the heaviest in weeks

So, that was nice. And helped to destress me a lot.

Sunday was more sedate. Got up earlyish, went over to Mr Casper's flat and ordered a Toot summer grab-bag and investigated holidays. Looks promising at this stage, even for OBon season (!)

Then, lunchtime-ish, headed over to gym for a few hours. Then to Sagami-Ono to try and get some fancy suit stuff. In the end, we just had tonkatsu, cos the dept store prices at Isetan (even on sale) were sort of pre-sale everywhere else! :oD

Anyway, then headed back to Machida and to Mina - P.S.FA and Orihica weren't great, but Aoki had several purchase-worthy ties and a nice shirt or two. Quite good fun helping someone else shop for that kind of stuff if you know what they want :o)

Ended the day with an obligatory Doutor cafe visit, and a nice relaxed chat. Good end to a good weekend, and good riddance to a bad week!

that's all for now -- have to give my latptop to Dave so he can finish his talk for Thursday!

A long time since I wrote in this

And it's a sad-sounding post.

The complexities of my love life have been tough, but I think it's coming to an end with Disney Guy.

Off to meet him tonight. He sounds like he's faced up to reality. I think we didn't stand much of a chance, but I don't want to say any more on that. Just, we had some good fun together.

Good luck everyone (/•;)

Presenting... the Amazing Ascending Bear!

Stefan is from Maihama 舞浜 in Chiba Prefecture.

I won't say any more, as I'm liable to embarrass myself...

(But I am rather taken with him.)

That is all.

R

I'm not a huge fan of these early-morning meetings. Those of us in Japan are doomed to attend them at 0700 every time.

I do wish Prof Thing hadn't been so self-sacrificing on our behalf...

蔗嶮邇?

On our way to lunch, we spied this massive, pig-shaped statue...!

蔗嶮邇 may be being honoured for his predictive abilities...?

Mum off home

This helps to explain the last 2 weeks' worth of blog absence, though none of the preceding silence.

I met mum here, at Narita, last Monday morning. And ten days later, I've just bid her goodbye til next time, and have boarded the more spacious, (though marginally more expensive) NEX 14 back to Shinjuku.

I think it was a successful visit! Actually, I'm sure it was, because she kept saying wha an amazing experience everything was.

We fitted in: a 2.5 day trip to Kyoto - by shinkansen (the bullet train, and my first at that!) which was a huge experience by itself; a rather successful shopping excursion around Machida (including getting Dad a present!); a trip up into the hills to an amazing outdoor art museum; a real natural onsen (also apparently successful); a birthday dinner for me with Casper; a boat trip up the Sumida river, a wander and souvenir shopping trip around Asa
kusa, and an encounter with the locals in the old pub there; and a couple of days of taking it easy around home.

Pretty good going for a first-timer in Asia.

The flat will seem empty tonight, so I've deliberately arranged to meet Casper if at all possible to have some nice company.

Interestingly, I see that Paisley has quit, according to the Japan Times front page. So mum will notice something else that's different on her return home.

I hope she takes happy memories back with her.

Compulsory photo

of meself and the mothership at a very Japanese-looking place.

Brilliant

I'm finally on holiday, and everyone knows it! Or at least, I've told everyone, and it's up to them whether they listened.

Either way, I'm on holiday with the Mothership, and we took the bullet train to Kyoto today, and have had a very lordy time eating in restaurants and luxuriating in the swanky hotel that Casper suggested as part of the package deal he organised.

Much kudos is rightly going to have to be paid back for this!

Herself is having a great time and is currently writing up her tour diary. I'm doing something marginally higher tech, and have uploaded a whole one picture to Flickr. Of me .

Plan is to spend tomorrow in Kyoto, then off til Nara on Friday before we come back on the bullet in First Cless... I like it!

a.t.h.

Morning!

'Ello. I'm daan the caff!

Which is, of course, not some greasy spoon, but a very trendy and unusually airy cafe here in my bit of my bit of west Tokyo. Yah yah yah....

Seeing as I don't get much time, these days, to update the oul' blog, largely due to the ongoing haven't-been-arsed-to-get-internet-at-home problem, I thought I'd take the opportunity to do so as I start the week off.

Came in here to read the e-mail y'see. Plus we have a visitor at the orifice, who's nothing to do with me, so I thought I'd hide here amongst the gentle jazz and sunshine shadows. This way, when I read my e-mails, I lose my temper a lot less ;o)

The Mothership arrives at the weekend, so I'd best be getting on with the work. And Disney guy visits tonight. And i'm supposed to be gymming, too! Argh!

run!

Knackering

That was knackering. Three people, and I couldn't see their faces, so I had no idea when they were losing interest.

I talk too much, anyway.

But, overall, it seemed to go okay.

We'll see, if they give me The Call™ (which these days is probably The E-Mail™)

Going home now. First to un café, then for dinner with Casper once he's back from pumping iron.

sleepy now....

I look forward to the bored Aussie translator on tonight's news saying, "In Sagamihara, Kanagawa prefecture, snow caused one bus to be as much as five minutes late. Kanachuu Bus Company apologised to passengers, saying they regret the delay, and will work hard to be as ready as possible for next winter's snowfalls. Now the weather..."